The most common test to determining whether or not someone is worthy of being a Facebook friend is asking yourself the question, “Would I say Happy Birthday to this person?” You can also ask yourself the question in reverse – “Would this person say Happy Birthday to me on my special day?” If the answer to either of these questions is “no,” then I think you know what you have to do.

Every morning when I log onto my Facebook, the birthdays tab is one of the first things I look at. I leave a comment and I’m done for the day. It’s one small sentence, but I know that somewhere along the way, it happened to make their day…cause it was their birthday. [needed a rhyming moment there.] You might be thinking to yourself right now, “Katie is such a horrible person. I can’t believe she defriended someone on their birthday!” Well, maybe – but let me clue you in on a few things.

Until I clicked that birthdays tab this morning, I didn’t even know this person was a friend of mine on Facebook. Red flag #1. I have never had any Facebook interaction with this person in my life. Red flag #2. I have, however, met this person in real life. Do I think this person remembered who I was? No, probably not.  Red flag #3.

When I went to this said person’s Facebook, they hadn’t had any updates since 2011. So who is this mysterious friend that is no longer a “friend?”

John Mayer’s younger doppelganger Teddy Geiger!