There are so few things worst than having to call off your own wedding. It has to be one of the worst experiences that anyone could go through, but bride Shelby Swink wasn’t going to this ruin what could’ve been her day. Instead, she still made the day all about her and that’s probably the best outlook that you could have on a situation like this.

Shelby was set to marry her ex-fiance this past fall after being engaged in the spring and spending two whole seasons planning their wedding. They met back in 2011 at the University of Tennessee and after dating for a few years, he had made the decision to move to her hometown of Memphis to be with her. A few days before the ceremony though, he had called the wedding off telling Shelby that he wasn’t in love with her anymore.

When I think of a wedding called off, all that comes to mind is Carrie Bradshaw and all of the wallowing she had done on her honeymoon. It was completely understandable of course, but Shelby had a different approach. She got strapped into her wedding gown, had her bridemaids and parents come dressed up, and together they took some incredible photos.

“I can’t even describe how liberating and cathartic the trash-the-dress experience was for me,” Shelby says. “The moment the paint hit my dress, I was free. I let go of all the hurt and disappointment and became myself again.”

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